I’ve recommended www.attitudemag.com before: it always contains a treasure trove of practical tips for people who have or whose family members have attention deficit disorder (ADD) or attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD).
This month features an interesting article by Marissa Kantor on planning for college. This is a tough time for everyone. The structure of high school and home life are replaced by a far more free wheeling life style where mom and the school teachers are no longer there to act as surrogate frontal lobes. Marissa lists seven essential life skills. Her list is terrific, but I would like to extend it to what I see as the Fifteen Essential Skills that anyone with ADD or ADHD needs to master before he or she can head off to college. The keys to success are organization, stability and resilience.
1. Learning to manage not just time, but energy: what to do and when, and also how much effort to put into individual tasks: people need to be taught how to use and organizer and how not to lose it!
2. Having good sleep habits: getting enough and waking up on time: There is more and more evidence that people with ADD and ADHD are prone to sleep disturbances that may increase the risk of a mood or anxiety disorder
3. Managing money
4. Taking regular physical exercise is an important aspect of living a balanced life: many people trace their adult inactivity to their college days
5. Being able to cook simple, nutritious meals
6. Doing laundry on a regular schedule
7. Being able to keep track of appointments
8. Remembering and fulfilling deadlines
9. Being able to keep on target with academic assignments
10. Working with teachers, tutors and counselors: who must all be aware that the person has a difficulty which may need some special help
11. Using medications – or other treatment strategies - appropriately and getting medicines refilled before they run out: we studiously avoid making medication changes during school time, and particularly when exams are looming; another good reason for not stopping and re-starting medicines during vacations
12. Avoiding the temptations of alcohol, substance abuse and relaxed attitudes toward sex are really important and also the most difficult to achieve: have a look at my article about some of the potentially disastrous consequences of untreated ADD/ADHD; even with treatment, young people are likely to be a least somewhat predisposed to these problems
13. Maintaining healthy relationships: it is very valuable for young people to learn about the impacts of positive and negative inter-personal relationships before they leave for college. They may well meet toxic people in college, and we can help them identify, void and detach from them
14. Maintaining a spiritual life can be very helpful to the young person with ADD/ADHD: they may well have had an active spiritual life while at home, and it’s a good thing to encourage some continuing form of spiritual awareness or spiritual practice. Not only is it a stabilizing factor, but it is important for people to be in the habit of thinking about thing outside themselves
15. ADD/ADHD is not all bad: we don’t want to romanticize a very real difficulty, but before the young person leaves for college it is well worth getting into the habit of seeing that there may be some positive aspects to the illness. Does the person with ADD/ADHD have a particularly entrepreneurial or creative flair, or an affinity with nature or with animals? Consciously thinking about the positives years in advance can pay enormous dividends during the early years in college.
Each of these items could easily fill a whole article. But something for family members to keep in mind is this: ADD/ADHD can be a serious problem that requires serious treatments. It can be a Labor of Hercules to keep young people on track, but remember that if you are a parent, you will likely have some leverage, particularly if you are helping them financially.
Technorati tags:Attention deficit disorder Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder Coping strategies Psychological resilience
Comments